My Life in a Nut Shell

3 surgeries for Endometriosis, countless medications, and lots of difficult years trying to conceive. We put the medical stuff on hold and decided to work on being parents instead. In July of 2000 we were blessed beyond all measure with a phone call announcing the birth of our daughter, Megan. Megan's birth mother had given birth the day before and was leaving the hospital. We had no warning that Megan was coming. At 4:29 in the afternoon we were a couple, at 4:30 we were parents. Deciding that we wanted a sibling for Megan, we looked into all our options. This time insurance covered IVF. One round and we were blessed with triplets, Abigail, Brigid, and Caroline. Did you know that there is a 70% chance of divorce in families of Higher Order Multiples? Almost two years after the triplets were born my ex-husband and I separated and eventually divorced. During that time both my Mother and Father passed away from cancer. In February of 2007 my sister came to live with us to help out. In December of 2008 she had to leave so now it is me on my own with the girls. In February 2010, Lisa passed away and finally found her own Peace.

Saturday, June 9, 2012

Why I don't like hugs

I'm hoping this doesn't sound like a whine.  I don't intend it to be but I'm going to sound like some kind of anti-social nut.  I don't like hugs.   I give them out a lot.  I like to GIVE hugs.  Not receive hugs.  I hug my children all the time.  I hugged the kiddos at the preschool I was employed at.  I've briefly hugged friends and co-workers.  I don't have a problem with giving out hugs.  I just don't want to receive one.

My Mother was an amazing giver of hugs.  It's been 8 long years without a hug from my Mom and I miss that.  When you don't get hugs often it makes it hard to receive one.  And I'm afraid I'm going to get a hug like my Mom's and then the flood gates will open.  And  I mean open.  I'll start bawling like nobody's business.  Let's face it.  I'm a single Mom without any close family.   I don't have a partner.  So I don't GET hugs.  My ex used to give me hugs that would allow me to drop all my defenses and just let everything go.   Just like my Mom. Well-meaning friends have given me hugs and while I appreciate those hugs I tend to accept them rather stiffly. Makes it easier to hold things in.   And I have to hold things in.  I have to hold it together.  If I don't then this family doesn't survive.   So I hold it in.

Please don't read this and immediately think you have to give me a hug.  I'm not looking for one.   Really not.  Just be aware that I'm not thrilled to get one.

And in other Harrigan news...

Megan made the honor roll for the year at her middle school.  First year in middle school in an AP math/science/technology program and the kid makes the honor roll.  I am so proud of how easy it comes to her.   I might also add that I know have THREE children in the AP program out of 4.  This single Mom who works full time, doesn't like hugs, and pretty much does it on her own, has three kids in AP.  I don't think I'm doing too badly.  The 4th kid struggles a bit.  I know she is smart but she has a hard time allowing her smarts to come out on paper.  She has so many other things going for her.  She is a social butterfly and let me tell you that kid can sing.  I mean really hold a note and stay with the melody of any song she sings.  

So there is my brag for the night.  

Otherwise not much going on in the world of Harrigans.  
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